I hate to keep denigrating poor ol’ Mr. Corsten, who is a world-renowned trance DJ, and responsible for some things that definitely make me happy, but he continues to crack me up.

This installment: doesn’t translate well/dorkiness. He does a weekly show (which I listen to) called “Ferry Corsten’s Countdown”. Said radio show plays “jingles” or sound clips between tracks. These little slogans are a version of bemusing cheesy lame that I’d like to share with you. Right now you can go to Ferry Corsten’s Web site and vote for the “best” one. You can vote for these gems (be sure to imagine them shouted in a strong northern European accent):

• “A DJ who operates above the law ” (leading, with something like 35% of the votes)
• “Armed with vinyl he conquers the world for those who doubt his skills!”
• “On a crusade for mass hysteria by spinning the wheels of steel!”

He operates above the law? In what capacity? What exactly is he conquering, now? Granted, maybe these started out in his native Dutch? Mass hysteria? DJs still say “wheels of steel” with a straight face?

Having thus disrespected, I must say that this week’s show was pretty good.