April 5th, 2008
You, dude who feels it necessary to use the women’s bathroom on my floor at work. I don’t really mind the whole Ally McBeal gender-neutral pisser. I am all about equality. But when you leave the seat halfway up* and dribble pee on the seat it makes me want to track you down and break your toes.
Jesus, I don’t get it. Men are anatomically gifted with a peeing device that they can <em>aim</em>. You nasty bastards should be way more accurate than we are. Knock it off.
You, sir, are a twit.
Tags: pee, twit
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April 4th, 2008
You, dipshit street girl with off-leash pit bull.
People are scared shitless by pit bulls. All the more so when they lope down the sidewalk unattended and unleashed charging directly towards them. Especially people (aherm) who have been attacked by dogs twice in the last year, unprovoked. You, watching the frightening beast run up to every pedestrian on the street and merely walking on your merry way. Shit like this causes people who are afraid of dogs to be more so and people who dislike them to feel more inclined to this opinion.
You, madam, are a twit.
Tags: dogs, twit
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April 4th, 2008
You, sir.
You, the effete bastard in the late-model Volvo. You, with the Oregon license plate tacked over your European plate that proves you Went to Europe and bought it there. You don’t realize how your pretentious display of your unnecessary license plate irritates me.
You, sir, are a twit.
Tags: cars, twit
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April 5th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
Talk to a janitor sometime. Women are just as capable of bathroom nastiness as men
April 6th, 2008 at 1:27 am
sure, they just don’t normally piss all over the seat. Not a issue I would get up in arms about myself but I guess you have a dog in this fight
April 7th, 2008 at 11:50 am
Women do often dribble all over the seat - this was explained to me once by a supermodel on David Letterman. Who knew?
It’s because the don’t sit down but instead use the ‘hover’ mechanism while very very drunk in the bar’s restroom facilities. And, as drunk, don’t notice their leftover mess.
I’m just saying..
April 7th, 2008 at 11:56 am
I should clarify. I got the tone wrong here. I didn’t mean to say that women are in any way less disgusting and primal than men. Not at all. It’s just that if you’re going to use the opposite gender’s bathroom, be gentle with it. There is, after all, a men’s room here, too.